Our trust in the Lord is tested.
How?
Like in a furnace or a forge until all the impurities are gotten out and there is a purified vessel that is ready for use.
Being in the presence of the Lord is tension. All of those men who were privileged to be in his throne room were affected.
How?
For the most part they fell to their faces without any strength left.
No one can stand in his presence and be unaffected,
No one who has been called by his name can expect to remain the same.
Some of the things he points at are things that we would like to get rid of.
Yes, I willingly submit to those things, rid me of them.
Then there are those deep rooted things, those things that don't want to let go, pulling them out hurts.
He is relentless and will contend with those things which are in the way of him having all of us.
His intention is that his children look like Jesus.
He is tenacious even in those things that cause us huge pain.
We would like for him to take his hand off and let us rest, but he won't.
He contends with our rebellion.
He contends with our pet sins.
He contends with the source of our attitudes.
Why?
Because he will have us.
He will possess us fully.
He didn't just save us so that we could be with him forever, although there certainly is that. But it is not all.
His desire is that we live this life abundantly.
Full of joy.
Free of guilt.
Longing to pursue him as he pursues us.
This is his desire for us.
Not to be half hearted and free spirited, but instead captivated and fully possessed.
I don't want to be weak.
I don't want to be in tension.
I would like for him to tell me of his love and his grace and convict me of those things which I hate.
But what about when he brings those other things up and we feel cornered?
How do we respond to that?
Trust.
Trust in what then?
Him.
In what, his ability?
Sure. But more than that we need to trust his provision, his love, his goodness, his will...
Ooh that's a hard one. His will.
But what if his will and mine are different.
What if I want an easy life?
One with testing that I understand and effects that I can predict.
What if I would like to be prepared before hand for what he is doing, respond correctly and predictably; then go on my merry way without unpleasantness and tension.
But no.
He has his will.
He has decided.
He knows what he wants to do, and unlike people whose will I can bend.
He is unbendable.
Unlike people who I may be able to manipulate.
He is not manipulated.
Unlike those who I can convinced to let me off easy and without pain.
He will not relent.
He will not give up.
He will not back down.
He will not lay off.
He will not give in.
He will not say uncle.
He will wrestle with me until I will not let go of him.
His will is like a river that does not shift.
His purposes are set in something greater than stone.
His purposes are set in those things he has sworn by himself to accomplish.
So what is my response?
What do I say to Him?
I say ok. I must say ok. You have your way.
Will it remove the pressure?
Maybe or maybe not.
But perhaps this is the real Christian life.
Maybe this is tension that is normal.
One day we will always be in his presence.
Maybe this is training for those days.
How will those days be different?
There will be no shadow between him and us.
No more looking through clouded glass.
No more reluctance.
No more half heartedness.
No more having just a downpayment of the spirit.
Instead.
Face to face.
Knowing as we are known.
Seeing as we are seen.
Able to give thanks with full understanding of what we are giving thanks for.
Able to finish what we have started.
Able to see how wonderful Jesus is without the enemy whispering lies.
Think of it.
Just think.
Ponder it.
Then let it frame your thinking.
Let that warm oil soothe and heal.
Then.
Listen to what he is saying and submit.
Even if it is through pain and trouble that we enter the kingdom.
I will know him. I will grow deeper into him. I will see him in more places and doing more things that I formerly realized.
And he will use what he has put in me to bless, heal, lift up, and strengthen.
